The lost art of camaraderie

‘The work was tough, but we had a lot of fun whilst doing it.’

Looking back over my own varied career, some of my most prized friendships have been forged in these moments.

We could call this camaraderie; a spirit of good friendship, loyalty, trust and mutual support that is formed in the pursuit of an exciting challenge or in the face of a powerful threat. It’s part of what makes humans flourish. It’s a necessary condition for people to bring their best and acts as a virtuous catalyst that multiplies creativity, agility, curiosity, courage and determination. These are all qualities associated with an excellent life. 

However, such camaraderie seems increasingly in short supply, especially in the workplace.

The latest Gallup State of the Global Workforce survey shows that 50% of the workforce are watching for or actively searching for a new job, citing a lack of belonging as a primary reason for wanting to move.

This is a pressing leadership issue. If our workplaces and communities are to thrive, we need to:

• help strengthen human bonds, not break them,

• create connections and bring people ‘in from the cold’,

• foster openness and resist power plays, and

• listen to learn rather than impose opinions on others.

In our observations at Leaders, there are four main conditions that suffocate camaraderie.

1.     The ruthless pursuit of efficiency. The leader who cares only about fast and measurable outcomes will cut out the investment and marginal time necessary for camaraderie to take hold. They hate it when people chat. They interrupt conversations in kitchens and tap their watches to make the point that time is money. Social budgets are tokenistic at best, and social events are only ever out of hours. Life moments - birthdays, weddings, births - are seen as interruptions rather than causes to celebrate.

2.     Self-centred ambition. These are leaders who position themselves for power and then exercise it in their own interests. They value others only as a means to climb the corporate ladder, readily dispensing with them once their use has passed. They pay themselves far more than others, believing that their contribution is remarkable whilst at the same time complaining that others are ‘entitled’. They defend against any suggestion that their ideas or role might need to change. They deploy legal threats and compromise agreements as standard.

3.     Factions. These are small groups within the company that form their own identity and actively sabotage others. This kind of internal competition is like someone punching themselves in the face; it takes effort, does damage and is for no benefit whatsoever. The justifications are usually either budget (‘we need to fight for our share of the money’) or management (‘management are useless, we’re not doing what they tell us’). But, in reality, these are simply excuses for an underlying negative attitude.

4.     A lack of drive. The leader who’s become complacent or is riding out their time before retirement will fail to motivate their people. Things get done day in and day out, but without a big idea or drive towards something better, people become bored. The best people leave, quality deteriorates, and bickering becomes the norm.

I hope you’ve never had to work in an environment like this, at least not for long. They are joyless and suffocating.

Instead, the best leaders we know foster lively and vibrant environments.

People are committed to achieving excellent outcomes whilst enjoying being there.

You can tell this by the ease with which people work together and the quality of the work produced. When we work with teams like this, nothing feels forced, yet they achieve phenomenal outcomes.

What marks the leaders in these organisations?

> They truly value their people. This isn’t just a strapline or marketing ploy. They genuinely care about the people they are working with. They enjoy and keenly value diverse perspectives, varied skills and different experiences. They therefore don’t impose a one-size-fits-all set of expectations. They flex so each team member can bring their unique perspective to the team. They take the time to understand their team’s needs and support their interests.

> They are optimistic, hopeful and ‘can-do’ in attitude. Whilst they don’t ignore risks, they are exciting to be around because they don’t turn back at the first sign of trouble. They tackle obstacles and deal with problems with courage. This type of leadership is inspiring and creates active followership.

> They work hard on team dynamics so that it is a whole-team effort with everyone pulling together. They encourage people, champion successes and at the same time resist the ‘hero CEO’ idea. Practically, this involves giving proper time to support and challenge their team, working to resolve personal conflicts, and acting in ways that foster trust (e.g. sharing information, creating opportunities, and showing appropriate vulnerability).

> They actively invite feedback. They are looking for disconfirming ideas rather than seeking a group of ‘yes’ people in their team. They don’t get defensive when someone else suggests a better idea. They would rather change tack based on new information than bake in mistakes that everyone knows will come back to bite later on. In other words, they want to multiply excellence, not flakiness.

We love to be around leaders and teams like this!

We’re ever practical; here are a few ideas that you could apply that help to support greater camaraderie:

• Eat together more. Even if this needs to be a working lunch, there’s something bonding about eating together.

• Do something non-work related together. Whilst forced fun can be counterproductive, socialising together or working on a charity project together strengthens relationships and can create some memorable stories!

• Kitchen time. If you have a kitchen area, hang around there for a few more minutes than usual. Choose to chat, make someone a coffee and ask how they are. This does not need to take ages, just a few minutes can make a world of difference.

• Celebrate life milestones in the team (birthdays, long service, etc). The caveat is that you need to be consistent; forgetting someone can undo all the good. It’s also helpful to consider what they like before choosing how to celebrate them. Some people like the limelight, others not so much.

What can you do to help create team camaraderie?